The Rev. Raymond F. Edmonds Jr., Pastor of Union Bethel AME Church located at 8615 Church Lane in Randallstown, MD recalled his mother adjusting to life after his father passed away in 2022. His parents had been married for more than 60 years.

The Rev. Raymond F. Edmonds Jr., Pastor of Union Bethel AME Church located at 8615 Church Lane in Randallstown, MD. His vision focused on the creation of a ministry that addressed the needs of widows and widowers. 

Photo by Ursula V. Battle

 “A widow or widower is not in the same position as someone who has never married or someone whose marriage ended in divorce,” said Pastor Edmonds. “They carry memories of a shared life - children raised together, holidays celebrated together, decisions made together, everyday routines and sometimes decades of companionship. How do you begin life over after being with a person that long?”

He added, “This is the person you have children with, you have lived life with, and you have done everything with. And so then, how do you process when that person is now gone? After one goes to the Homegoing Celebration, it’s back to life as normal. But for those persons who have lost their spouse, that’s when the real process begins - of now beginning this new chapter without the person that you love.”

As Pastor Edmonds encountered members who had lost spouses, he was convinced that their needs deserved intentional, focused ministry. Thus, the Widows and Widowers Ministry was born - birthed his spiritual calling to address the unique needs of widows and widowers by providing a supportive community for them to share their experiences and find solace. 

Headed by co-Leaders Vivian Salters and Dr. Priscilla Smothers, the group generally meets once a month on Saturdays from 10 a.m. – 11 a.m. at the church. Approximately 35 members comprise the group, who engage in a variety of activities including workshops, community outreach, and creating ornaments and other keepsakes in remembrance of their spouses. 

Co-leaders Vivian Salters and Dr. Priscilla Smothers head the Widows and Widowers Ministry. 

Courtesy Photo

 One of Pastor Edmonds’ earliest conversations was with Salters, who shared his belief that such a ministry was needed at Union Bethel AME Church. Together, he and other ministry leaders began developing its mission.

 “At the heart of the ministry is a biblical principle, as we are called to care for widows, widowers and orphans, as they hold a special place in God's heart,” said Pastor Edmonds. “The goal is to create a community grounded in faith, hope and love, where people who have experienced the death of a spouse can support one another through grief, healing and the process of rebuilding life.”

 Pastor Edmonds believes churches often do an excellent job of responding to practical needs after someone loses a spouse - making sure there is food, calling, visiting, and providing other assistance or support immediately after the loss. But he believes care must go further.

 “Do we provide a ministry for them to come together, for them to talk about their needs?” he asked. What will life be like after burying a spouse? What is it like to wake up in a house that suddenly feels different? What are holidays like? What happens when children and family members return to their own lives? And what happens months or years after others assume the grieving period has ended?

Those are some of the realities Union Bethel’s Widows and Widowers Ministry was created to address.”

 Reflecting once again on the loss of his father, Pastor Edmonds recalled his mother telling him she felt alone. 

 “I reminded my mother that she had children and family,” he said. “But her response to me provided me with additional insight. She said, ‘You all have your own lives to live.’ That sense of isolation is exactly what this ministry seeks to interrupt. Members are encouraged to build relationships with others who understand their journey - people they might call on a difficult day, meet for lunch, attend a movie with or simply sit beside without having to explain why a particular memory suddenly hurts.”

Beyond learning to live with loss, Pastor Edmonds wants members to begin imagining what still lies ahead.

 “God does have something great for you in this new chapter,” he said. “Let’s now begin looking at the possibilities of the new that can happen in your life.”